Just Because She’s Wet Doesn’t Mean She’s Horny (Medium)

February 2, 2017


Can you think of an occasion when your penis got hard and yet you weren't aroused? Have you ever experienced 'morning wood'? Or random erections due to nonsexual physical stimulation?... (read more)

Actually, Talking About Porn With Your Kids Is Easy & Crucial (Romper)

December 10, 2017


The first time I saw porn was in my parent’s bathroom. My dad kept Playboy and Hustler in a neat stack next to the toilet, secured by an ashtray that never moved. The ashtray to me symbolized a padlock—it was understood that we were not to touch the ashtray, not to lift it to peek at what lay beneath. But we did... (read more)

So You Have An STI. What Should You Do Next? (Men’s Health)

November 30, 2017


It’s often hard for people to know how to talk about sexually transmitted infections (STIs). The topic can prompt a lot of awkward or potentially stressful conversations. But if you’re a grown man who has sex with other adults, you need to be equipped with the proper tools to navigate your sexual health safely and mindfully. Because the truth is, STIs are way more common than you think.... (read more)

Your Low Libido Is Probably Normal (Romper)

November 13, 2017


When I was a child, I was a proud DARE kid. I believed Deputy McGruff when he told me that if I smoked a 'doobie,' I’d become entangled in a world of crime, failure, and depression. In my teens I thought that only musicians and skateboarders fell victim to 'reefer madness' and that weed would impede my brain’s development. Plus I hated the smell: it was like an even worse version of patchouli... (read more)

I’m a Sex Worker Asking the 9th Circuit Court to Decriminalize Prostitution (Medium)

October 23, 2017


For the first time in thirteen years, the U.S. Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals is revisiting the legality of full service sex work. The case is ESPLERP vs Gascón, in which three sex workers, one client, and the Erotic Service Providers Legal, Educational and Research Project are challenging the state ban on prostitution... (read more)

Is Your Bike Killing Your Boner? (Men’s Health)

October 20, 2017


Erectile dysfunction: it’s every man’s worst fear. Unfortunately, it’s also pretty common: according to one estimate, nearly 18 million American men struggle with erectile dysfunction in some form. There are many factors that contribute to ED, notably poor diet, lack of sleep, and stress. There’s also one potential cause that we don’t often talk about: cycling... (read more)

ABC Knees (A Whore’s Poem)

October 7, 2017


It’s just a joke, I’ve heard... (read more)

I’m A Mom Who Smokes Pot With My Kid In The House, & I’ll Tell You Why

September 19, 2017


When I was a child, I was a proud DARE kid. I believed Deputy McGruff when he told me that if I smoked a 'doobie,' I’d become entangled in a world of crime, failure, and depression. In my teens I thought that only musicians and skateboarders fell victim to 'reefer madness' and that weed would impede my brain’s development. Plus I hated the smell: it was like an even worse version of patchouli... (read more)

I Have A Child On The Spectrum & I’m A Stronger Parent Because Of Her

August 11, 2017


For people with mood, anxiety, and sensory disorders, trying to 'fit in' becomes the most stressful aspect of life. I won't hold my kid to some ridiculous standard of learning or self-expression, simply because her brain doesn't function the way that many others do... (read more)

I Only Fuck Feminists (Medium)

July 16, 2017


I am a woman who unabashedly loves men. I love them short, I love them tall, and I love them bearded, shaved, bald, trim, or chunky. I love the way they smell; I love the scratch of a stubbled jaw against my cheek. How do I adore men? I could count the ways... (read more)

Massage Ring (Unbound)

July 7, 2017


Her keys jangle and *clunk* as she throws them on the counter, pecks my cheek, and pads down the hallway to the bedroom. There, she will peel off her clothes and toss them aside, while I begin to fill up the bathtub and start the kettle to boil water for tea. My woman is on her feet all day, bending and lifting and kneeling and scraping. And I wait for her, at home... (read more)

I’m Raising My Daughter Without Gender Roles (Romper)

June 12, 2017


When someone is pregnant, we usually ask them, "Is it a boy or a girl?" When I was pregnant, I asked myself the same question, and my sonogram confirmed it: there was a tiny vulva on the human growing inside me. But even though I knew I was having a girl, what did that actually mean?... (read more)

I Won’t Pierce My Daughter’s Ears, Because Honestly, I Think It’s Wrong (Romper)

May 16, 2017


Every morning, my daughter watches me fluff my cheeks with a brush and adjust a silver ring through my septum. My septum is the oldest of my facial piercings. I’ve had it in my schnozz for 11 years. I had it professionally stretched, and I can fit cocktail straws through my nose. My partner’s earlobes are pierced and stretched to the point that they resemble onion rings, and my daughter’s dad is so heavily tattooed that I’m certain the palms of his hands and the soles of his feet are the only places where he doesn’t have ink... (read more)

Yes, I Want My Daughter To See Me Naked, & Here’s Why (Romper)

April 22, 2017


I was giving my 5-year-old a bath in our tiny tub littered with toys when she started giving me an impromptu breast exam. "That nipple is longer," she said, pointing at my breasts. I looked down to verify this new bit of information. I counted my nipple hairs: one, two, three, four. I lifted my skin to examine the underside of my boobs, noting the recent crop of tiny, black hairs. "Interesting," I said, and looked around for the tweezers... (read more)

I’m a Sex Worker Who Is Sick of Female Misogyny (Huffington Post)

April 12, 2017


So you’re a feminist, ey? You tell your kids that girls and boys are equal? That little ladies can grow up to be firefighters and astronauts, that boys can play with dolls and paint their nails? That’s a good start, but the bare minimum a decent adult can do in the year 2017... (read more)

What It’s Like To Be A Mom & A Sex Worker (Romper)

April 4, 2017


I’ve been a sex worker for eight years, and a parent for five. I chose both of these jobs. I’m constantly tired, sore, and dehydrated, and that’s before I head to the night shift... (read more)

How To Give A Blowjob

April 3, 2017


I’ve been reading blowjob tips in ladies’ and men’s magazines for a decade, and I’m sick of the same ol’ "poke ’em in the perineum" recommendation. I’ve culled my own tips and tricks, and gathered the knowledge of a porn star and two sex educators who actually enjoy S-ing the D. I also polled my male readers and found a few common affinities. Feel free to take notes, or email me suggestions... (read more)

Why I Call My Partner "Daddy" (Romper)

March 23, 2017


Calling my partner "daddy" in bed is new to me—I used to find the kinky term of endearment to be stomach-churning, but now I call my partner "daddy" in bed because I think it’s pretty hot. I’m 30 years old, and I’ve had sex with people of all genders, but mostly cisgender men, for half of my life... (read more)

I Gave Oral Sex To Induce Labor (Romper)

March 16, 2017


If you Google "how to naturally induce labor," you’ll find a host of articles. Acupressure massage. Bananas. Pineapple. Nipple stimulation. Raspberry leaf tea. Visualization. Yoga. Wine, even. I tried each of those things, and a few more (like giving my partner oral sex to induce labor, but more on that later)... (read more)

Elle Answers Your Your Sex & Dating Questions

February 28, 2017


Monogamy for bi-sexuals. Serene vaginas. Trauma and libido. In this edition, we opened our inbox to a few of your questions. Have a pressing question you’d like to ask? Hit up the comments section or contct Unzipped PDX podcast team via email... (read more)

Childbirth Absolutely Changed The Way I Orgasm (Romper)

February 14, 2017


Before I had my first baby. I’d always been an orgasmic gal. My mom caught me humping my giant stuffed elephant before I was old enough to ride a bike, and in kindergarten, I learned that if I sat "criss-cross-applesauce," I could rub my right heel against my pubic mound to stimulate my tiny self to orgasm, with hardly anyone the wiser. But if I'm being honest, it was having a baby that totally changed my relationship with my orgasm... (read more)

Honestly, My C-Section Scar Makes Me Feel Self-Conscious During Sex (Romper)

January 14, 2017


The first time my mother had a c-section was when she gave birth to me. The doctors couldn’t find my heartbeat in that Kansas hospital in September 1986, so I was pulled from her womb. At the time, there was little conversation about vaginal births after cesareans, so my younger sister was born in the same manner three years later... (read more)

A Stripper’s Guide to Body Hair Removal for Men and Women (Thrillist)

December 9, 2016


For many of us, body hair removal is an integral part of our pre-sex preening process. Do you prefer men with trimmed pubes and hairy pits? Do you like your ladies with Brazilians, or bushes? There’s no hard-and-fast rule on this stuff... (read more)

Signs He’s Undateable, According to a Stripper Who’s Seen It All (Thrillist)

December 9, 2016


As a stripper for the last eight years, I’ve seen it all. Here are some signs that person you’ve been seeing is definitely NOT relationship material... (read more)

My Plastic Surgery Is Feminist As Fuck (Slutist)

December 9, 2016


I shouldn’t have to defend my boob job, but here we go... (read more)

Elle Oh Elle: Everything You Need to Know About Working as a Stripper (Thrillist)

October 27, 2016


It takes more than pole-dance classes and locker-room selfies to become a stripper. Stripping—and the hustle of selling your time and company—is a competitive sales job in a highly stigmatized atmosphere... (read more)

Elle Oh Elle: 7 Variations On The Missionary Position That Are Anything But Boring (Thrillist)

October 22, 2016


In spite of it being one of the most common, intimate sexual positions, missionary still gets pushed aside as being too basic. Why is that, when it lets you kiss, embrace, and allows at least one of you to indulge in a bit of on-the-back laziness?.. (read more)

Elle Oh Elle: Car Sex Is Underrated. Here's How to Pull It Off (Thrillist)

September 12, 2016


The first car I had sex in was a Ford Thunderbird. Since then, I’ve maneuvered my way toward climax in a Jeep Patriot, Chevy S-10, two Subarus (Outback and Forester), and two VWs (Passat and GTI)... (read more)

Elle Oh Elle: What Does Transgender Mean? Your Guide to Understanding Trans Terminology (Thrillist)

September 2, 2016


For this edition of Elle Oh Elle, I’ve enlisted the voice of Monika MHz, a Portland DJ and columnist. Monika is a trans woman, and she’s here to explain how you can make the world a better place by removing transphobia from your life... (read more)

Elle Oh Elle: It’s Time to Put an End to Small Penis Jokes (Thrillist)

August 29, 2016


I get it&mdashsmall dick jokes are grade-school easy, and the screenshots look super snazzy on your Tumblr feed. But when you fling a micro-penis joke at some douchebag, you’re actually doing more harm than good. Here’s why... (read more)

I’m a Stripper, But I Just Visited a Sex Club for the First Time (Thrillist)

August 18, 2016


It was my first time in a sex club. And for all my experience with nightlife and sex as a professional stripper, I had little experience with a combination of the two. I admit: I was nervous... (read more)

Your Sex Questions on Double Penetration and More, Answered (Thrillist)

July 28, 2016


Welcome to Elle Oh Elle, where Portland-based writer and adult entertainer Elle Stanger takes your sex life from subpar to subversive... (read more)

What Happens When Strippers Fall in Love With Clients? (Thrillist)

July 19, 2016


"How did you two meet?" It’s a common question, and some couples have more interesting answers than others. For me, I met the father of our child for the first time in July of 2009, a few weeks after I had started stripping. As a new stripper, it was overwhelming enough trying to dance nude. But as I gradually became comfortable with my new gig... (read more)

Porn-Star Sex Moves That Can Still Work in the Average Bedroom (Thrillist)

July 14, 2016


Great sex doesn’t require fancy toys. You don’t need sexy lingerie or a dizzying repertoire of dirty talk, and you DEFINITELY don’t need a ton of experience to give any lover a memorable romp. Often, porn-star sex just requires you to ditch the script of boring bedroom habits and your standby, tried-and-true positions. To do so, I’ve compiled a simple list of variations you can make on old favorites... (read more)

Yes, Watching Porn Can Make Your Life Better (Thrillist)

July 12, 2016


I recently read a New York Times piece blaming pornography for the rise in labiaplasty in teenagers, and I read an Elle magazine article that pointed the finger at BDSM pornography as a cause of physically abusive relationships... (read more)

Slutwalking in Portland (Slutist)

July 7, 2016


I was having trouble with this phone conversation, as I have every year for the past three years. "S as in Sam... S, L, U, T, W, A, L, K... No ma’am this is not a prank. Yes, I’m an organizer for this event"... (read more)

Confessions of a Former Sex Shop Clerk (Thrillist)

June 24, 2016


Working as a porn clerk for four years was a brilliant, outlandish adventure better than any Chuck Palahniuk novel. I watched sweet grannies try on sexy maid outfits in the dressing room... (read more)

Elle Oh Elle: Physically Challenging Sex Positions to Try at Your Own Risk (Thrillist)...

May 27, 2016


Missionary, doggy style, woman on top: those are basically the primary colors of humping. I was challenged by Thrillist to try a more extreme approach to penetration, with these five physically challenging sexual positions. I wasn’t going to go it alone. How could I? First, I asked four folks who work with bodies for a living to study... (read more)

Four Presidential Candidates Walk Into a Strip Club...

May 07, 2016


Presidential races should be relegated to a strict discussion of policy, not hypothetical character studies. But since Hillary charges $2,700 for a selfie, Trump is a walking subreddit comment section, Cruz is the Zodiac killer and Birdie Sanders is a Disney princess, this POTUS race really couldn’t be any more outlandish... (read more)

What the Stripper Is Thinking While She Gives You a Lap Dance (Thrillist)

April 01, 2016


I’ve given approximately 20,000 lap dances. Some have been pleasurable, some were repulsive, some have been downright perplexing. And, of course, I can’t possibly recall the vast majority of them... (read more)

I’m a Sex Worker, and This is What I’ll Tell My Child (Elephant Journal)

March 18, 2016

Hello, Daughter. As I type this, you are in your bedroom, coloring and playing. You will be four years old on Wednesday. You asked to see my new shoes today. They were a gift from a customer. "Are those for dancing?" you asked. I smiled, "Yes." "Are they for your work?" I paused. And smiled again. "Yes."... (read more)

Elle Oh Elle: Expert Advice on Sex Drives, Online Flirting, and Bedroom Compatibility (Thrillist)

January 28, 2016

In this edition, our resident love meter has opened up her inbox to answer readers’ pressing sex questions about everything from depleted sex drives to pursuing sex via hard drive... (read more)

Elle Oh Elle: What Stripping Has Taught Me About Dating Men (Thrillist)

January 10, 2016

For most humans, having a conversation with a stranger is a daunting endeavor. That’s why blind dates, Tinder dates — any dates, really — are stressful: we’re looking to gather information about the other person while portraying the best, hopefully honest version of ourselves... (read more)

Elle Oh Elle: Eat Your Way to Better Sex (Thrillist)

December 09, 2015

Happy Holidays. Have you finally thrown out those congealed Thanksgiving leftovers? Did you pack yourself full of meats and breads and sauces, and are you ready to do it again? Good news, my intrepid, perverted eaters: we’re going to talk about cooking for healthy humping... (read more)

No, My Child Does Not Have to Hug You: Why I’m Raising My Toddler to Understand Consent (Elephant Journal)

December 5, 2015


We cook and drink and laugh and argue and drive to gather in the warm homes of folks that we call "Friends and Family." Kids play and fight over toys and video-games. Adults cook and drink... (read more)

Expert Advice on Libidos, Clearing Your Mind, and Banging Your Ex's Best Friend (Thrillist)

November 11, 2015

Low libido. Sexual ADHD. Unrequited love. In this edition, we opened our inbox to a few of your questions. Have a pressing question you’d like to ask? Hit up the... (read more)

Elle's Slutwalk Portland Review (Online Exclusive)

October 11, 2015

Oh, the things I saw at Slutwalk. It is September 20th, 2015. It is noon on Sunday, and I've loaded up the vehicles of friends with the PA system that my daughter's father has donated for the event... (read more)

The Fact and Fiction of Open Relationships (Thrillist)

September 22, 2015

Welcome to "Elle-Oh-Elle," thrillist's new column in which infamous Portland-based writer and entertainer Elle Stanger will help your sex life go from subpar to subversive... (read more)

The Erotic Muse: September 2015 (Exotic Magazine)

September 1, 2015

"Well, here girlie, I won’t buy a dance, but I’ll get you a drink and help you scout out some real money." The young man was former military, quite handsome, and passively insulting me. I was still standing at the bar... (read more)

The Erotic Muse: In Bed With Our Next President (Exotic Magazine)

September 1, 2015

The great American pastime; no, it’s not really baseball. It’s the cutthroat antics of the media circus known as the Presidential Election cycle. It’s hard to imagine a better collection of caricatures, and yet here are the front-runners... (read more)

The Erotic Muse: August 2015 (Exotic Magazine)

August 1, 2015

If, according to that old adage, the definition of "insanity" is doing the same thing multiple times and expecting a different result, I still haven’t figured out what the definition of "weird" is... (read more)

Elle Stanger Takes on Gamergate (Burro)

July 04, 2015

It was Christmas afternoon in 1996. The adults were cooking and drinking upstairs, and the kids, myself included, were still in love with the plastic goodies we’d just earlier unwrapped. My prize for the holiday... (read more)

The Erotic Muse: May 2015 (Exotic Magazine)

May 1, 2015

"You got any Dragon Lady films?" It was 2005, in a southern California porn shop, and the octogenarian at the counter was asking me a question that that was so far indiscernible at the least, and vaguely racist at worst. I faltered, "dragon... lady?" He shook his head, annoyed... (read more)

The 10 Strip Club Commandments (Thrillist)

January 06, 2015

Strip clubs are like temples, except instead of religious iconography, they happen to be full of beautiful women and booze. And like a temple, there are certain guiding principles that one... (read more)

The Erotic Muse: June 2014 (Exotic Magazine)

June 01, 2014

I remember it like it was last night; yet it was summer of 2009, when the slender, dark skinned, sparkling stripper took the stage. Her name was Choco-latte, or something similarly outlandish... (read more)

The Bare Necessities (Burro)

April 01, 2014

We were naked, the four of us, except for the boots on our feet and the bundles of heavy, mismatched clothing that we held to our torsos.. The stiff wind blew up my backside and the other... (read more)

As Real as it Gets (Burro)

November 01, 2013

Seated, my hands rested on my bare thighs and crossed legs as the young man looked earnestly in at my face. He was searching my expression to the question he had just asked, "When... (read more)

A Judge’s Notes: The Fourth Annual Vagina Beauty Pageant (Tits & Sass)

August 16, 2013

I was dressed modestly in a knee-length black dress, white Converse, and a denim jacket, and felt as comfortable as any stripper can when behaving as a civilian at a strip club event... (read more)

Let’s All Laugh About Abuse Via Twitter (Burro)

July 10, 2013

I have no idea who Kelly Oxford is, but she ruined my Imgur experience last night. The mindless right clicking that gives me so much joy was quickly interrupted when I realized that... (read more)